April Fools' and Stuff

Possible April Fools' Tricks to Play on Patrons at the Library:

1. Tell people who don't have a fine that they have one. (And be mean about it.)

2. Tell people who have a fine that their account has been cleared by an anonymous person. (Then laugh at them when they come back another day.)

3. Explain to people that they now have to pay to rent movies and books. "Libraries aren't what they used to be, buddy!"

4. And if they complain, look around quickly, give them their items in a paper bag, and tell them to "make a run for it!"

5. Tell quiet people to "Shhhhhhhh!"

6. Tell loud people to "speak up, we're in a library for goodness sakes!"

7. When everyone comments on the snow that's currently falling, say, "What snow? It's spring!" Insist that there is no snow falling. Because there's NOT.

8. Act like a robot. Put up a sign that says that, since people seem to think that ANYone can do a librarian's job, we've just been replaced.

9. Run through the aisles screaming and pulling books off the shelves. See how far you can get before you are tackled to the floor by a well-meaning patron.

10. Hide behind the book drop slot and grab patrons' hands as they try to return books.

Well, these certainly sound like fun, but I have a certain reputation at the library that I'd like to maintain. And it doesn't involve lying and acting like a maniac. To be honest, April Fools' Day isn't really one of my favorite days. Facebook is a mess. People act all goofy. And I'm always jealous that I'm not creative enough to do anything good...

I hate chocolate!

April Fools'.

Whew, that's over with.