Step 1: Pick out your book. Pick out a mystery, a graphic novel, a memoir, a book of poetry. Browse the stacks until you find just the perfect read. Ask your friendly librarian for suggestions if you find yourself whining that everything you pick out is boring.
Step 2: Pick out another book. What if the first book isn't quite what you thought it would be? Or you read the first book too quickly? Honestly, it's just foolishness to leave the library with a single book. Be smart and get a back-up.
Step 3: Go to the circulation desk. Be mindful of those around you. Don't cut anyone else off. And it's nice to offer your spot to a harried mother with seven children hanging off her. Other than that, wait in line for your turn. Or, if your library is dying because no one wants to read anymore, step right up and enjoy the great service of three librarians all wanting to socialize and thank you for still coming. Haha...
Step 4: Present your library card. Don't be surprised that you are asked for it. If you're a patron of excellence, you have your card in your hand right away. Don't be the person who doesn't have your card...or your driver's license...wait, you're driving without a license AND without a library card? Good luck out there, man.
Step 5: Don't forget your receipt! It's given to you for a reason. Don't lose it and then feign innocence when you return items late (I mean "if"). And don't take your receipt, look at it, and then ask when your items are due. What do you think I'm handing you exactly?
Step 6: Walk out the door with your FREE books! And don't forget to come back now, you hear?
I mean, you'll have to. To return them.
2 comments:
Just don't laugh at me when I pull out my voter's registration card or my shopper's club card by accident and all will be well!
These are so perfect. I especially love #5.
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